Everybody can say yes. It is really easy. We want to please people around us. And we want to please ourselves. Saying no on the other hand is a different story.
We want to live up to societies expectations as well as our own. You can always take on a little bit more work. There is always room for more responsibility. There is always a friend or family member you can help. And there’s a new project you can start. It feels nice to please. To make others happy. It’s a great feeling to please yourself too. It can give a sort of high. A feeling of flow in your life. But if we put out more energy than we produce we are bound to fall off this merry-go-round.
Hitting the wall or burning out. It is the new normal. If you haven’t been on sick leave from work due to stress once in your life, your abnormal. At least in a society like Norway where we can afford to take sick leave. There is so much stress, so many expectations. Therefore people understand you when you hit the wall. They accept your holiday from work and society. In Norway the state pays you to go to courses where you learn to listen to yourself and say no. But is saying no accepted? What do you think of a person who declines an offer or an invitation and who choses to do nothing instead? Is it ok to be selfish and preserve your energy?
What if society helped itself, it’s people, in a proactive way, by making room for saying no. It is good to do nothing. You don’t have to be a superstar. Isn’t the world a better place if it is filled with happy and energy filled people instead of tired and short tempered bombs waiting to explode?
I wish the new normal would be happy and balanced.
Can’t agree more, Anniken. Since I have learned to say “no” – most time in very polite way – I feel much better. Listen to my inner voice leads me to my way. Living my way helps me being happy and as a result making others happy too. And, I strongly believe that expectations is one of the biggest killer for feeling free and being happy.
Merry christmas and a happy new year for you and your family.
Love & peace,
Thanks for the refreshing comment Bernhard:-) Great to see that some people actually take care of themselves:-)
Merry christmas to you too:-)